Number 180 Winter 2019 • $11.95 RITUALSIssue 181 / Spring 2020 LOVE LETTERS Submission Deadline: January 21, 2020 www.rfdmag.org/upload We’re asking you to consider love. Recently, we’ve been reading Proust’s letters to Reynaldo Hahn, his first lover. Many of the earliest letters were suppressed by Proust’s family but even the letters available to us cast a light on how basic language engages the heart. On Hahn’s side there are his letters as well but also his wonderful music. So we’re asking you, our readers, to consider either love letters, poems or photos or artwork which came to you as a way of someone showing you their love and appreciation. Oftentimes, something passionate is caged in the moment of passion or love making and is fixed in time, while a letter, a poem, a note can act to fix the memory, to memorialize it as well as casting a spell of reverie, continuance of that moment. Such things often bring us closer to our desires and often scare us with the power of that moment. We both cherish it as precious and amazing and being a place of proof of something more than that one moment. Consider sharing those moments with us as a way to celebrate the divine wonder of passion, desire and its aftereffects release. Please look in all places where love was returned to you as a fragment fixed in time. Please share this widely as we’d love to hear from as many lovers as possible. RFD 180 Winter 2019 1 Ritual Faeries Dancing Vol 46 No 2 #180 Winter 2019 And those who stand without, who see the dance and do not hear the music—what more weird fantastic folly, the madness of the saturnalia, the sacred fury of eleusinian or evantian choir, ever dawns upon their dazzled darkness! —Harriet Elizabeth Prescott Spofford (from “Sir Rohan’s Ghost,” 1860) Ritual. As queer as nature, intrinsic to life, they (r)evolve us through the patterns, rhythms and repetitions that express the innovations of our same-sameness, difference by evolutionary difference. Our rituals, those pageants of the Fool and ecstatic ceremonies of queer spirit initiate us to continue to come out and, if only temporarily, guide us into and through mythopoeic realms, the sacred spaces of our own co-fabrications. In the fae-ephemeral we become gatekeepers and psychopomps tending thresholds between life’s knowns and death’s unknowables. Rituals at their best revive to embody imagination. At their worst they perpetuate violence by pilfering other culture’s mysteries. As ritual artists how do our practices decolonize and unsettle supremacist paradigms? And in times of near despair, how do our endogenous rites renew our sense of child-like-wonder? This edition of RFD has gathered a coven of poets, essayists, and the visually crafty to call us to back to our own initiatory journeys, into the creative erotics of our own lives. Between these sheets you will find magical recipes, mundane rants and other sex-blessing texts to guide us through the challenging days ahead. Given the wisdom of the primary and deep connection to our ancestors we’ve learned from indigenous practices, we begin this edition with pieces celebrating the lives of two pillars of our extended communities, noting the amazing lives they’d led, the gifts they freely offered within ritual settings. May the magic of our intersecting communities encourage us to outwit the fear-fuelled monsters at our gate. May the portals to what Harry Hay called “new vistas of consciousness” be lovingly opened and never again through malice be broken. May our mystical rites continue to queer the wyrld-hole. With big kisses from a hillside in Vermont —The RFD Collective Between the Lines2 RFD 180 Winter 2019 RFD is a reader-written journal for gay people which focuses on country living and encourages alternative life- styles. We foster community building and networking, explore the diverse expressions of our sexuality, care for the environment, Radical Faerie consciousness, and nature-centered spirituality, and share experiences of our lives. RFD is produced by volun- teers. We welcome your participation. The business and general production are coordinated by a collective. Features and entire issues are prepared by different groups in various places. RFD (ISSN# 0149-709X) is published quarterly for $25 a year by RFD Press, P.O. Box 302, Hadley MA 01035-0302. Postmaster: Send address changes to RFD, P.O. Box 302, Hadley MA 01035-0302. Non-profit tax exempt #62-1723644, a function of RFD Press with office of registration at 231 Ten Penny Rd., Woodbury, TN 37190. RFD Cover Price: $9.95. A regular subscription is the least expensive way to receive it four times a year. First class mailed issues will be forwarded. Others will not. Send address changes to submissions@rfdmag.org or to our Hadley, MA address. Copyright © RFD Press. The records required by Title 18 U.S.D. Section 2257 and as- sociated with respect to this magazine (and all graphic material associated therewith on which this label appears) are kept by the custodian of records at the following location: RFD Press, 85 N Main St, Ste 200, White River Junction, VT 05001. On the Covers Front & Back: “The Sisters of Fulfillment Sing Their Songs of Contentment Under the Autumn Night Sky,” by Donald L. Engstrom-Reese Production Guest Editors: robin hood and Rosie Delicious Managing Editor: Bambi Gauthier Art Director: Matt Bucy Submission Deadlines Winter–October 21, 2019 Spring–January 21, 2019 See inside covers for themes and specifics. For advertising, subscriptions, back issues and other information visit www.rfdmag.org Visual Contributors in this Issue Images or pieces not directly associated with an article. Mike Kear .................................2,41 Joel Singer. ...................................7 Michael Starkman. .......................13,35 Joseph Minutello. ............................19 David Monteith-Hodge. ......................20 Devlin Shand. ...............................27 Kisses / Catherine Deneuve 26,57 Ryan Buchholz ..............................29 Donald L. Engstrom-Reese. ................30,32 Lux. ........................................37 Madrone Jack. ...............................43 Ian Douglas. ................................46 Samhain drum circle altar 2017. Photo by Kerfuffle aka mikekear.com. RFD 180 Winter 2019 3 CONTENTS Be Travels On, A celebration of Life and Death .........Mountaine ............................5 Michael W. Hathaway ...........................................................7 We Are Faery ............................Michael Hathaway .....................9 Bad Ritual Guide .........................Bad Dog .............................10 Calling the Queer Corners .................Oshee Eagleheart .....................15 Invocation/Out-Vocation ..................Andrew Ramer .......................18 What We Faeries Learned About Ritual From The Dance For All People: ‘Structure Is Not a Dirty Word Any More’ ..Kwai Lam ............................21 Hot Seat: It’s Like Heart Circle, But Also a Gangbang ...................May .................................23 Ritual: Walking Between Worlds ...........Sâde Gryffin .........................27 The Winter Dreamers Are Singing ..........Donald L. Engstrom-Reese ............31 New York City Radical Faeries Yule .........Donald Gallagher .....................34 The Importance of the Trickster ............Trixie ...............................35 Ritual, A Life’s Journey ....................West ................................38 Ritual Queen .............................Shokti ...............................40 Interview with Keith / Cuz’n ...............robin hood ...........................43 Poem ...................................D.S. Humphries ......................47 Rituals ..................................Timothy White Eagle and Adrain Chesser .48 Faerie Sex Magick Turns Thirty ............robin hood and participant-facilitators ..50 Ritual In Performance .....................Crafty / Shelton ......................52 Kali Dasi ................................Dossie Easton ........................54 Honoring the Vow to Prosymnos ...........Frater Guaiferius .....................55 The Kisses of Ares ........................Wes Hartley .........................58 Don Shewey on “The Paradox of Porn” ......Franklin Abbott ......................604 RFD 180 Winter 2019 Be on the Short Mountain Sanctuary porch. Photo courtesy author. RFD 180 Winter 2019 5 Be, a/k/a William Byron Whiting II, a/k/a Bundle Be, was born on March 21, 1929 in Delevan, NY, and took his last breath at the age of 90 on October 13, 2019 in Liberty, TN. B e was many things to many people. He was an unmissable presence at Short Mountain gatherings starting in 1980. He was the ultimate drag queen—his outfits were unique and often over-the-top in their fabulosity, and at 6’2” he and they were very visible! (Unlike many aging folks, he didn’t seem to lose any of his height over the years.) He immersed himself in gratitude for all the gifts showered on him in his life. His sunny personality and charismatic style were legendary. He often told new Faeries about the difference between clapping one’s hands (indicating approval or—heaven forfend—obligation!), and hissing (in solidarity). He once said, “I never met a dick I didn’t like!” And he got to like a lot of them! Sister Soami (“Mish”) was editor of this maga- zine for many years, and remembers Be as “the best proofreader RFD ever had,” able to read the entire issue in twenty four hours and return it with impor- tant corrections. He was known to express his views strongly in public from time to time. When he shouted, “Focus, people!” or “Shut up!” his words were heard across the land. He was the revered “bundle keeper” for the Tennessee Naraya / Dance for all People, and was very serious about his ceremonial role of keeping peoples’ prayers alive and vibrant. Be was a highly skilled actor, director, and pup- peteer. From 1964-1974, he was a member of the famous Bil Baird Marionette Theater, based in New York City. He performed with the Bairds in their huge show in the Chrysler pavilion at the 1964/65 New York World’s Fair, toured with them for ten years, and joined them frequently on television, including a Muppet Christmas special, and their enactment of the landing on the moon. In later years, Be loved to regale listeners with his fabulous memory of the opening night of the Bairds’ Wizard of Oz puppet show. Be had already played the Wicked Witch onstage, so he was the puppeteer chosen for that role. It turned out that Margaret Hamilton (the iconic wicked witch in the original movie) was in the audience. She sought him out after the show, and said, “Your witch was just marvelous. The torch is passed!” In telling the story, Be said, “I’ve lived on that, as almost all my friends can tell you, for the rest of my life. Actors don’t get that kind of accolade all that often!” In 1974 Be moved to Virginia Beach with his then-partner Henry, to be more involved in the spiritual work of Edgar Cayce. He was also active in professional theater there, and played many lead roles, including Lady Bracknell in Oscar Wilde’s The Importance of Being Earnest, and Malvolio in Shake- speare’s Twelfth Night. Then in 1998 he relocated to middle Tennessee to be near his Faerie community. In 2005 he attended the first Tennessee Naraya/ Dance for all People, and those ceremonies led by native elders became a huge part of his life up to the end. For many years, until his health begin declin- ing in 2018, he drove across the country every year to attend these events in Utah, Montana, at Wolf Creek in Oregon, and other places. To enjoy his long-distance driving, he praised the combination of frequent coffee and marijuana! Not many years ago, Be reconnected with his best friend Bill from childhood. When they found each other online, they hadn’t been in touch since high school. Be loved telling the story of his first visit back to the Buffalo area to see Bill again. They were taking a drive, revisiting memories of places they’d gone together as youths, when Bill asked, “Do you remember what we used to do when we pulled the car over?” Be certainly did! And Bill continued, “Do you think we could do something like that again?” Be eagerly agreed. His gorgeous blue eyes would light up when speaking of Bill as his “boy- friend.” Since around 2012, Be didn’t make it to most SMS Beltaine gatherings, because Bill’s birthday was May 1 st , and Be preferred to drive twelve hours each way from Tennessee and spend the gathering week with him! In 2015, at age 86, I got to travel with Be, cele- brating his first-ever trip to Europe. He told me (and the many friends who helped to pay for his trip) that Be Travels On A celebration of Life and Death By Mountaine6 RFD 180 Winter 2019 ever since the age of twenty he’d dreamt of being in England and returning on an ocean liner. So it was a really big deal, and fun in so many ways! He was an ideal travel companion, whether gawking at the Mona Lisa, taking in ballet and concerts, seeing Judy Dench and Kenneth Branagh in Shakespeare, meeting up with Faeries in Paris and London, or eating magnificent food. To complete his dream, we returned on the Queen Mary II ocean liner, a seven- day immersion in luxury. In reviewing the cruise ship itinerary, I saw that there was to be a masquerade ball one evening. I mentioned it to Be months in advance, and suggest- ed that if he wanted to bring one of his ball gowns, I’d be his tuxedo-clad escort. Of course, he readily agreed. And what fun we had, appearing in the vast dining room at the top of the grand staircase, glid- ing arm-in-arm to our table, astonishing the ladies who were our nightly dinner companions, dancing together to a live jazz band, and then proudly win- ning a costume award. Be’s health had a resurgence for his fabulous 90 th birthday celebrations, for a four-day trip to New York the same month, and for Short Moun- tain Sanctuary’s Beltaine 2019, where he again demonstrated the power of his flamboyant spirit at the Mayday ritual, calling in “Grandfather Sky.” He also made his final stage appearance at that gather- ing—in a fabulous cameo as Southern Belle Eve, one of the Seven Dream Eves in the powerful Faerie production of Paradise Lost in Space. His big line, delivered in an exquisite Southern drawl, was: “I have always depended on the kindness of strangers.” The following month, his seizures started. By late summer he was in a nursing home. When his doctor put him on anti-seizure meds, and said that cannabis would interfere with its effects, Be was very sad that he’d never be able to smoke weed again. Then, six weeks later, a few hours after his death in the home of a dear friend, some members of his (very fabulous and dedicated) care team smoked a joint, and one of us blew the smoke into his mouth. Picture that, and make up your own story about how he treasured the gift! A few days earlier, on increasing doses of mor- phine, Be had been less and less verbal, sinking into himself. But at one point he sat up suddenly, and with the clearly enunciated and well-projected voice we knew so well, spoke three words: “ Grace under Pressure. ” That was his final statement (at least while in his body) on how to savor this beautiful hu- man life. It was a most gracious ending to the life of one of the most gracious people I have ever known. From about 2009-2012, Be worked on documenting his life through a series of performances titled “Be Live,” and interviews with Jacqalin Maple Keeling (known then as Free). The notes from these projects allow for the reconstruction of his life story, in his own words, in great detail. Here’s an (edited) example from the period when he lived in Virginia Beach: “In 1980 I got involved with the UUGC, the Unitarian Universalist Gay Community. At their Fourth Annual Gay and Lesbian conference on Memorial Day weekend, the keynote speaker was Harry Hay. His speech was about faeries—how faeries are born, not made—and about the respect we deserve as human beings with special gifts. I will never forget the final line to his talk. He said: The Day will come, though I may not live to see it, when a faerie child is born into a family (and make no mistake, they always know by age six or seven, or often earlier) and the reaction will be ‘Gasp! One of those!!!’ Not ‘Ew. One of those.’” “I also attended a workshop (with two of my friends) that Harry gave on subject- subject consciousness, the whole idea of treating people as subjects, not as objects. Harry invited us to go to Colorado in August for the Second Annual Gather- ing for Radical Faeries. And we decided to go. I was working as a social worker at the time, back to my college major, and I got the time off. (One does have to eat, and the theatre scene in Virginia Beach did not pay all that well.) I had a ‘64 Ford Falcon at the time. The three of us piled in the car and traveled to Colorado. The trip there was an adventure in itself. But when we got there, it was mind-blowing: 325 or 350 people from all over the world, talking about their lives. There were a lot of Faeries there, and I realized I was one of them! So that began my career as a Faerie. The next year, in 1981, Short Mountain held its first spring gathering, and I decided I really needed to go. I’ve been going to the Mountain twice a year ever since. I’ve missed a few through the years, but not many.” RFD 180 Winter 2019 7 Authored by Michael Hathaway, with edits by James Griffith, Richard Parker and BB Ha! W onderful faerie spirit Michael Hathaway (Billie name: Hank) died on Vashon Island, Washington, January 2, 2019. He grew up in Southern California and lived his long and notably peripatetic life in San Francisco, Sonoma County, Cambridge MA, Bavaria, the Greek Islands, Kathmandu and Prague. After de- cades as an environmental activist and poet, he wrote a multi-volume memoir demonstrating “the pos- sible happiness of life.” His personal ideal- ism and optimism were gifts from his mystical German-born mother and his loving American dip- lomat grandparents, gifts nurtured by seven years at the progressive and very liberating Happy Valley (now Besant Hill) School. He studied Russian lan- guage, culture, politics and history at Stanford —and also rowed varsity crew. Graduating with honors, he went on to graduate work at Harvard, the Free University of Berlin and ancient Charles University in Prague. With fluency in seven languages, he was a cosmopolitan global citizen. For a time, he seemed destined for teaching, writing and thinking—the quiet life of the scholar. But in his mid-twenties, the Vietnam War inter- vened, forcing choices on him (like millions in his generation) that fundamentally ended the prospect of an ivory tower life, just as surely as it overturned the nation and the world. Michael’s deep feelings about the war’s crimi- nality let him to quit his Harvard doctoral studies to become a peace activist, and eventually to serve on the national staff of Eugene McCarthy’s 1968 insurgent presidential campaign. That summer, with thousands like him in Chicago for the Demo- cratic National Convention, Michael got first-hand experience of the price peaceful protest can carry, and was beaten in the streets during the infamous police riots that enveloped the convention. It was a startling lesson for someone unac- customed to violence, inexplicable in terms of the values he lived by and thought the country shared. (Sound familiar?) Sen. McCarthy’s heartbreaking defeat—and Nixon’s cyni- cal victory that Novem- ber—left him suddenly adrift, searching for a new path through which to live and teach those values. Learning—lifelong learning—and the love of teaching and nurturing were still at his core, but not to be lived out in the cloistered confines of uni- versities. He morphed into a “longhaired, VW-van- living hippie.” This alterna- tive lifestyle presented a problem: he began to run out of money. Thus, in the early summer of 1969, Michael returned to Santa Barbara where with the help of friends he found work as a researcher at the Center for the Study of Democratic Institutions, Robert Maynard Hutchins’ legendary progressive think tank. Here he could use his intellect and learning— but also keep his ponytail, VW bus, and spend his off-hours building the local antiwar movement. After two years at The Center, Michael re- turned to Europe, where he discovered the beau- tiful island of Hydra in Greece. Entranced by its beauty and the charm of its inhabitants, Michael realized that his $2,000 savings could buy a hand- some five-arched, 440-year old ruin of a house. Michael W. Hathaway 11/11/1941–1/2/2019 Portrait of Hathaway by Joel Singer.Next >